It’s so easy to see everyone else isn’t it? They shine so brightly, so beautifully. You can so clearly see all their talents, how gorgeous they are when they smile. How they are open and authentic and wise or witty and quick and so, so, clever.
It may be a brilliant light that hits you in the eyes as soon as you meet them or a more subtle glimmer that takes time and trust and intimacy to begin to see, but once you glimpse it, it’s always, always there.
And as you compare yourself to all these shining lights, all this bright, awesome, glittering talent and how amazing and wonderful their lives and careers and relationships must be, you may start to feel that you have no shine at all.
Not a spark, not a speckle of glitter anywhere. Your job sucks, you can’t get yourself together and organised, your love life is dead or absent and being single feels like the loneliest place in the world.
Your own world, your own life shrinks down to something grey and dull and pretty damn depressing!
But what you need to remember is how brightly YOU shine to those you see you.
How what you have, others wish they did too.
How your smile lights their life, how your talents make their lives easier, how your love and concern and caring lifts their hearts, how gorgeous you are when you forget to play small and you let yourself be authentic, real, vulnerable, YOU.
Our curse as humans is that we can NEVER truly see ourselves and our own strengths, beauty and glorious light in the same way that we can so easily see the shine of others, and because we can’t see our own light, we compare ourselves to the glow of others and feel so “not good enough.”
Not smart enough, not pretty enough, not thin enough, not talented enough, not brave enough, BUT, you are, you truly are good enough RIGHT NOW!
Start to notice the compliments you get, the positive things that others say. REALLY notice! Don’t shrug it off and think “if you really knew me, you wouldn’t say that”.
Start to look at yourself in the mirror and put some LOVE into your eyes.
Turn that nasty, critical voice down, imagine a big STOP sign in front of it every time it starts to cut you down or remind you how not good enough you are.
Get some feed back from people who love you and then, BELIEVE what they say.
If they tell you that you are so wise and understanding and talented and lovely, BELIEVE them!
If your children hug you and tell you that you are the BEST Mummy in the WORLD, soak it in, OWN it.
Accept the compliments you get, the kindness you receive, the love in your life.
If only YOU could see how brightly you shine to those who love and appreciate you, tears of joy and gratitude would overflow your eyes and love would fill your heart.
Don’t diminish your light.
Don’t compare your shine to others, don’t shrink down and believe for a second that you are less than loveable, less than wonderful.
Nourish the spark you have, feed it with love and appreciation, shield it from comparison and criticism and negativity.